Flash the Wonder Dog

Episode story by Buzz Dixon

Episode teleplay by Buzz Dixon and David Wise

Summarized by David L. Junker AKA "The Junkyard Dog"

 

The story opens with an outdoors shot of a clock tower about to strike noon. On this particular clock tower, we happen to see three mobster-like men, one short and fat, one not so short and skinny and one who is just plain BIG! They are dressed in black suits and hats and they stand surrounding a young, blonde woman tied to a chair, which is resting on a pile of dynamite.

"For the last time," says the big man to the blonde, "are you gonna give us the secret recipe?"

"NO! NO! A THOUSAND TIMES NO!!!" the woman answers.

Dale is watching this, biting his fingernails typewriter style. Dale?! HE CAN SEE THIS?!! Why aren't the Rescue Rangers doing something?!

The scene shifts back to the clock tower. "I was hoping you'd say that," the big gangster smiles, "because when the big hand gets to twelve," he pointed to the clock," it'll light the dynamite and blows you to kingdom come!" A rather harsh punishment for keeping a RECIPE secret if you ask me!

Once again we see Dale, rubbing his hands together this time. WHERE IS HE EXACTLY?!!

"C'mon, boys! Leave us get out of here!" The mugs are about to beat a retreat when they are frozen in their tracks by a....uh...what sounds like a dog howling the opening notes of Richard Wagner's "Ride of the Valkyries"!!

"ARR-OWW-ARR-ARR-OWWWWW!"

The "camera" pans over to show a German Shepherd-type dog on a nearby rooftop. He is dressed in a Superman type costume except there's a paw print where the big "S" would be and he wears a blue mask, if you can call it that, that lets his ears stick out and it doesn't cover his snout at all.

"IT'S FLASH THE WONDER DOG!!" the woman squeals excitedly.

"HOORAY!!" yells Dale. I give up. I don't know where he is.

"And Conrad Cockatoo!!" says a white cockatoo in a costume like Flash's, who has just flown in to view, landing on Flash's back. Flash smiles at Conrad, then with a mighty leap, flies through the air, landing on one side of a board, which is teetering on a railing. The skinny hoodlum, who was standing on the other end, is sent flying through the air. Odd, there weren't any boards in sight on the clock tower a minute ago And why would the skinny guy stand on the other end like that? And would Flash's weight REALLY send a MAN flying through the air?! But back to the story......

'Yeah yeah yeah! Get 'em get 'em get'em!" Dale yells at the TV screen as Flash is chewing on the skinny mug's leg. AHA!! Dale is watching a TV show, called "Flash the Wonder Dog" apparently, and is REALLY into it. Dale bounces up and down on the couch, throwing punches in the air, cheering his TV hero on until he nails HIMSELF with an uppercut!

"L-l-l-ook out for those uppercuts!" Dale mutters semi-consciously.

Back on the screen, Flash was using a board to slingshot a can of black paint onto the small fat thug's head.

"Yay, Flash!" howls Dale.

"Hey! What's going on here?!" asks Chip, who has come up from behind. He meant what was going on in general, but Dale thinks he wanted to know the plot of the TV show and gives him a quick summary.

"THEBADGUYGRABBEDTHEGIRLANDTIEDHERUPTOTHECLOCKWITHDYNAMITEBUTFLASHTHEWONDERDOGCAMETOTHERESCUEINTHENCKOFTIME!"

Chip is giving Dale an annoyed look during this speech and rolls his eyes at one point.

Dale slows down for emphasis. "'Cause when the clock gets to twelve, the whole thing goes..KABLOOEY!!!" Dale throws his hands up at the "KABLOOEY", his right hand knocking Chip on his back.

"OH NO!!" wails Dale, looking back at the screen.

On the tube, Conrad Cockatoo was pulling at the ropes holding the woman to the chair and the CLOCK WAS ABOUT TO STRIKE TWELVE AND..The screen went blank!

"Hey! Whatcha do that for?!!" Dale yells at Chip, who has turned off the TV. Dale tries to turn the TV back on but Chip blocks his path by leaning back and forth, his hands on his hips and an annoyed look on his face.

"You're too wrapped up in that show!"

"What do you mean?!" asks Dale, standing straight and pointing a finger straight up in the air, ready to make a proclamation. "Flash is the greatest hero there ever was!"

"He's just an actor!" scoffs Chip.

"He is not! Look at all the things he can do!" says Dale, holding his hands in the air.

"It's all fake, Dale! They do it in a TV studio!"

Dale gasps and stares at Chip as if Chip had just killed a sacred cow,

"HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT!! Flash is NOT a FAKE!!"

"Yes, he is!" "Is not!" "Is too!" "Is not!" "Is too!" "Is NOT" "IS TOO!" The fight is underway.

The "camera" pans over to the doorway leading outside where Gadget is watching this with a little smile on her face. "Well, I can tell you're both busy! I'll come back later," she says, closing the door on her way out.

 

The screen dissolves to a shot of another TV tuned in to "Flash". The fuse on the TNT is lit, Conrad is making progress with the ropes, Flash is scaling the side of the clock tower and a familiar voice is saying.

"The poor child! At the end of her rope.with no one to save her but this poor excuse for 'MAN'S BEST FRIEND'!"

The screen cut's to the owner of that familiar voice, Fat Cat, who is sitting at his desk in his HQ, stirring a drink.

"It's bad enough that he has a BIRD for a sidekick!" the fat feline rants, "But to make a hero out of a--" Fat Cat slams his drink on his desk and went into a state of mild horror ".D-D-D-D-DOG!!!! HOW REVOLTING!!!" (This brought a low menacing growl from the throat of yours truly the first time I heard it.)

Fat Cat pushes a button on his desk. The doors of the round elevator to his left open and in march The Four Stooges..Mepps, Mole, Snout and Wart.

"You called for us, Fat Cat?' asks Mepps, saluting.

"No..I was testing my moron magnet! OF COURSE I CALLED FOR YOU!!" bellows Fat Cat, slamming his fist on his desk, making his four cronies cringe. "Now then," he continues, easing back into his chair and twirling his whiskers, "what do I hate more than anything else in the WORLD?"

The four hench-animals huddle like a football team for a while, discussing it, then they stand, look at Fat Cat and Mepps answers, "Uh.DOGS?"

"Oh, goody!" says Fat Cat, clapping his paws together sarcastically. "I see you've been paying attention!" (THAT statement produced a growl and made every hair on my back stand straight up! I am a dog, you know.)

"And who is the world's most beloved dog?!" asks Fat Cat.

"FLASH THE WONDER DOG! I watch his show every chance I." The other three cut off Mole's ranting by clamping their hands over his mouth.

"CORRECT!" snarls a VERY annoyed Fat Cat. He walks about the room, circling his thugs..a plan forming in his mind. "If we grab Flash and ruin his goody good reputation," he purrs, looking at his four accomplices, "then the only dogs people like will be." Fat Cat looks straight at the viewing audience, twirling his whiskers, "HOT DOGS!!!!"

 

Screen cuts to view of "Flash" from inside the TV studio

Flash is swinging towards the clock tower on a rope (I thought he was already ON the clock tower! IS THERE A SCRIPT DOCTOR IN THE HOUSE?!). Anyway, Flash swings around to the back of the clock tower, revealing it's a hollow studio creation and that there's ANOTHER FLASH waiting for him!

"Thanks for doing all the hard stuff, Sam," the other Flash says in a Dudley-Do-Rightish voice, taking the rope from the panting "Flash" who just swung over. "I can take it from here!"

THIS Flash walks around to the front of the Clock Tower where the woman, who was freed by Conrad, throws her arms around him! "Oh, Flash! You saved me! (HE DID?!!!) How can I ever repay you?!" Flash gives the camera a modest smile "all-in-a-day's-work" style.

The screen cuts to a view of inside the control booth where two men wearing headphones work the controls as Flash, seen on four TV screens, lets out a "ARR-ARR-ARR-ARR-ARRRRRR"! The screen then cuts to a far shot of the clock tower and an announcer says, "Flash the Wonder Dog will be right back after this word form 'Sludgie', the new cereal made from mud! (YUCK!)"

Conrad flies off to somewhere and the woman and Flash make their way to the ladder leading to the floor. The woman goes down the ladder but Flash paws at it then cowers down, whining at the people below.

"All right! All right!" yells a red-haired white-shirted man down below (the director would be my guess). "Frank! Get the crane!" A crane with a platform pulls up to assist Flash down from the ledge. "Who'd ever believe that Flash the Wonder Dog is afraid of heights?!" the director mutters as he walks away.

Meanwhile, Mepps, Mole, Snout and Wart are sneaking around the dressing room area, dragging a large sack behind them. They eventually come to a door with a star and the name "FLASH" on it and they duck inside. A second later, Flash wearing a robe and sunglasses walks into the hallway. "Oh, what a day!" he groans. "I feel so knocked out!" A rather prophetic statement, for when the door closes behind him there is immediately sounds of a struggle, followed by a king-size bonk-on-the-head sound. The door opens and after making sure the coast is clear, Fat Cat's four helpers creep down the hallway, dragging a rather full and slightly moving sack behind them.

 

Some time later, a picture of Flash appears on the screen of the Rangers' TV, and with it, an announcer's voice.

"This just in!! Flash the Wonder Dog has disappeared!"

"What?!" exclaims Dale falling backwards, off of the tomato pincushion chair.

"The canine was last seen on the set of his number one TV show!" the announcer continues as Dale rushes from the room.

Gadget, Chip and Monty are all in the hangar. Gadget is using a needle and thread to sew up one of the wings on the Ranger Plane as Chip helps the thread along and Monty turns the spool that the thread is on..

"Just a few stitches and this wing will be as good as new!" Gadget exclaims. "Well.as good as it was before!"

Just as she says this, Dale bursts in. "What a catastrophe! A calamity! A disaster!" he howls. He runs around the other Rangers, tangling himself in the thread. In fact, he tangles everyone in the thread and pulls poor Gadget off the wing onto the floor!

"What is it?!" asks Chip.

"Flash the Wonder Dog has DISAPPEARED!"

"Oh, brother!" Chip moans.

"We gotta do something! We gotta find him! Something terrible's happened to him!! I just know it!!" Dale continues to wail.

Chip brings Dale back to his senses with his usual technique. BONK!!

"You've been watching that show too much!"

"Maybe we should look for him," says Gadget, who somehow is back up on the wing, untangled and everything!

"Right, mate!" adds Monty as Zipper (there he is!) hovers into view.

"How can we say we're willing to rescue anybody if we're not willing to rescue everybody!"

"Pleeeeeeeease?" says Dale with his hands in a prayer position, looking at Dale with puppy-dog eyes (no pun intended).

"Oooooooooh..All right! If it means that much to you.." Chip gives in.

Dale tackles Chip, rolling both of them into the wall..his usual way of showing he was happy with him.

"Ohthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou." Dale says, kissing Chip's paw with each "thank you".

"OK! OK! OK!" says Chip, retrieving his paw and shoving Dale backwards.

 

At a nearby construction site, a group of workers are preparing to lay a foundation for a new building.

"Ready to pour?" calls the foreman to someone across the lot. The foreman was standing in front of the mixing truck that had no one in the driver's seat. Fat Cat and his four co-conspirators are standing behind it. They are all dressed in Flash shirts and capes.

"Costumes ready?" Fat Cat purrs

The four henchmen (if you can call them that) each put on a "Flash Cap," which had ears and a snout. It still didn't make any of them look like Flash, if you ask me. "Ready, Boss!" they answer.

"THEN WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?!" yells Fat Cat. The four quickly run off to their assignments. Fat Cat dons a "Flash cap" as well (He looked like a midget, mutant kangaroo expecting 17 children. It was going to take a blind and simple-minded buffoon to mistake him for Flash) and jumps into the cement mixer's driver's seat. He takes to the controls, dumping the contents of the truck onto the red car behind him.

"HEY! NOT YET!" yells the foreman, running over to the car. "OK!" he says, steaming and looking at the group of workers. "WHO RUINED MY CAR?!"

Fat Cat enjoys the moment for a while before sticking his head out the window and howling, "OWW-WOO-WOO-WOO-WOOOOOO!' He springs from the window, laughing as he runs away on all fours.

"Flash the Wonder Dog?!!!" exclaims the blind and simple-minded buffoon of a foreman.

 

A few blocks away, some men are unloading boxes of apples when Snout appears on top of the crates. He chews through the rope holding the

boxes together and they crash to the floor, spilling apples everywhere. "TA-TA-TA-TA-TAAAAA!" the huge rat sings at the shocked workers who can only stare at him.

 

Another few blocks away, Mole is sneaking up on a baby carriage, as the mother standing nearby is distracted. He reaches into the carriage, pulls out a HUGE baby bottle full of milk (How big is this kid?!) and gulps it all down himself, smashing the bottle on the ground for good measure. The mother shrieks and the baby starts crying. "TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TAAAAAAH!" sings Mole.

 

Still at ANOTHER place a few blocks away, a short old man is painting a scene of a smiling man and woman on a billboard. "Whew! I could use a drink of water!" he says, lowering the scaffold down and running off.

 

Wart peeks from behind the billboard, laughing wickedly. "Finally! I get a chance to express my true artistic nature!" he says, jumping onto the scaffold. He ties the red paint can to rope that is used to pull the scaffold up. He hurls the bucket down and is hauled up to the top of the billboard, where the paint cans all spill down the billboard. Wart grabs another rope and swings down in front of the billboard, painting a red mustache on the man and woman. He uses an ink stamp to put a paw print on the bottom, then scampers behind the billboard as the old man is coming back.

"Huh?!! WHO RUINED MY MASTERPIECE!!??"

"HEH-HEH-HEH-HEH-HEEEEEH!!" exclaims Wart peeking from around the billboard.

"This looks like the work of..FLASH THE WONDER DOG!!" exclaims the old man (rather corny line, I must say).

 

Meanwhile, the Rangers were flying over the city in the Ranger Plane searching for any sign of Flash. I should say Dale was looking for any sign of Flash. Everyone else was looking.tired.

"Dale, we've been out all day looking for Flash," Chip moans. Gadget is flying, Chip is in the co-pilot seat and Dale and Monty are in the back. "Let's go back!"

"NO!" yells Dale, putting down his binoculars. "He's out there!" Dale takes a deep breath and howls, "TA-TA-TA-TA-TA-TAAAAAAH!!"

"What are you doing?" asks Gadget.

"That's Flash's special howl," explains Dale. "If he can hear that, he'll reply!" NOW he thinks of that!!

"I'm sorry, mate," says Monty, "but the chances of him hearing a little squeak that must be a million to.."

Monty is cut off and all the Rangers stiffen as, somewhere down below, a mournful howl answers Dale's squeak.

"Arr-arr-arr-arr-arr-arrrrrrrrrr"

"IT"S HIM! IT"S HIM!" Dale howls triumphantly, pointing down.

"He must be in that abandoned building," says Gadget, pointing to a good size-building down below. It's a good size building except it has a couple of floors missing and no ceiling over a large kitchen-like room. Gadget lands the Ranger Plane on the floor of that room. The floor is not quite complete and it's quite a few floors down to the street!

As the Rangers get out and make their way across the floor, Dale loses his footing and almost falls off! He grabs the edge of the floor, nervously looks down then pulls himself up and hurries to catch up with the others.

The Rangers sneak down the ceilinged hallway next to the kitchen, past Mepps who is standing guard in the hallway. Actually, he's sitting down, asleep, in the hallway. Wait a minute! Mepps was with Fat Cat and the others at the construction site, in a Flash costume, a little while ago! Why was he putting on and now he's.oops. A little flaw in the story line there! Anyway

The Rangers have successfully gotten past Mepps when we notice there's a slice of cheese in Mepps' sandwich..CHEESE! OH NO! Oh, yes. Monty gets a whiff of it, goes into his "cheese reaction" and then floats along with the cheese aroma back towards Mepps. Little Zipper turns, sees this and let out a shriek of alarm, pointing in Monty's direction.

Monty is about to pull the cheese out of the sandwich when Chip grabs him and hauls him backwards. The two of them tumble end over end into the wall. Monty soon smells the cheese once again but Chip gives him a few slaps across the face, snapping him out of it. Chip motions for Monty to follow them, but Monty, with an evil grin, hurries over to Mepps (ARGH!), pulls out the cheese, gulps the whole slice down THEN follows the others. No one notices when Mepps twitches around a little, opens one eye and grins evilly!

Dale is looking through a small hole in the bottom of a door on the right side of the hallway. "It's HIM! It's HASH! I mean IT"S FLASH!" he howls at the others. They all rush into the room and there indeed is Flash, looking very forlorn (possibly ashamed) lying in the middle of the floor. Dale, forgetting himself for a moment, runs up to Flash and gives his snout a big hug! Flash is startled and sits straight up.

"Hey, little feller!" Flash exclaims, understanding Dale is a fan. "Who are you?" he asks, wanting to know his fan's identity.

The other Rangers run up to Flash. "We're the Rescue Rangers.to the rescue!" says Chip.

"Looks like you're the key to this puzzle, Zipper ol' pal!" Monty says to the fly who salutes and darts over to the door. He goes inside the keyhole, picks the lock, reemerges and turns the knob. The door opens up, much to the delight of Flash, who stands up, his tail wagging like crazy!

"C'mon, Flash," Dale calls from the doorway, "let's go!"

"Go WHERE?!" says a grinning Mepps, who has suddenly appeared behind them, bending over to grab Dale and Chip!!

Monty quickly jumps up and pulls Mepps hat down over his eyes. "Run for it, blokes!" he yells. The Rangers and Flash run past the blinded Mepps who still manages to give chase screeching, "Come back here(wheeze).you guys!" (As if they're going to!)

The Rangers make it to the Ranger Wing but the floor of the kitchen-like room gives way under Flash's weight. Flash is terrified but manages to grab the edge of the floor with one paw.

"Jump, Flash!" yells Dale.

Flash looks down, gulps hard then tries to scramble up. "I can't!" he wails. "I'm afraid of heights!" He turns around trying to pull himself up. Mepps, who has hat back in place, is running towards him!

"You've gotta do it!! You've gotta jump!!" Dale yells at his hero.

Mepps, by now, is right above Flash and attempts to grab him (like an ALLEY CAT can handle a GERMAN SHEPARD!) when a part of the floor gives way and Flash plunges down!

"FLAAASH!!!" Dale screams

Flash howls in terror as he plunges to the pavement below!

COMMERCIAL BREAK

 

As we come back from the commercial, Flash is still falling and the Rangers are zooming down in the Ranger Wing after him. "FLASH!!!" Dale screams again.

Just then, Flash's cape snags on a windowsill, stopping his fall, although he was still quite a few floors up and with his fear of heights.....

"Hang on!" Dale calls from the Ranger Wing, which was still high above the perched pooch's position.

"Hur-r-r-r-r-r-ryyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!" Flash squeals covering his eyes so as to not have to see where he was. Just then, his cape rips and Flash falls a few floors, thrashing wildly.....WHANG!....onto an old rusty flagpole, to which he applies a vise-like grip with all four legs. He looks up as the Ranger Wing glides down to his position. "Don't go away!" Gadget calls (AS IF he had a choice).

(I'd like to bring up a point here. Flash fell through a floor in the middle of the building, yet he's falling along the outside of the building! The explanation for this would be that that room was connecting two building together about twenty stories up. But it wasn't! That would have been to far for Flash to jump and an earlier shot SHOWED that that wasn't the case. How big a goof can you make?! OK, back to the story)

Dale looks on all this with bewilderment. "Why doesn't he just climb up the side of the building like he does on TV?!"

"Because he DOESN'T do it on TV!" Chip explains. "A STUNT DOG does!"

"HUH?!!!" STUNT DOG?!!!" Dale is caught totally off guard.

"Lower away, Luv!" Monty says to Gadget making a lowering motion with hand and looking out and to the left at.....?

Gadget pushes a button next to her (where the gear shift lever of a car would be) and what looks like a fishing pole reel pops up. Gadget starts turning it rapidly and, LO AND BEHOLD, a fishing line with a hook on the end emerges from under the Ranger Plane through the bomb door. Zipper flies down and stands on the hook, signaling Gadget which way to go. The hook snares the edge of an awning down below. Zipper squeaks "Pull her up" (or something like that) to Gadget who pulls the end of the awning to a piece of metal in the wall, making a trampoline for Flash.

"Everything's ready!" Chip calls to Flash who is still clinging to the flagpole with his eyes closed tight. "Jump, Flash!" Dale calls.

Flash looks at the trampoline for a second, then closes his eyes again, getting an even stronger grip on the flagpole. "I-I-I can't! I-I-I-I'm S-SCARED!!" he howls.

Dale is dumbstruck. "Flash......the Wonder Dog.....SCARED?!!!!"

"NOW what do we do?!" Chip asks no one in particular (he's looking at Flash as he says this).

Gadget rubs her chin in thought for a moment, then snaps her fingers. A smile spreads across her face. "I have a plan! If we could....." But Gadget is interrupted by the sound of the old, rusty flagpole breaking off of the wall and Flash resuming his fall, howling as usual, for the third time in less than two minutes (or pages). Gadget looks up and says, nonchalantly and still smiling, "Oh! Never mind! Strike that!"

Flash hurtles toward the awning trampoline with the sound (effect) of a diving jet. Despite having a fear of heights and a stuntdog to do all the hard stuff at the studio, he seems to show some stuntman skills as he flips in the air and lands on his back. He bounces once then slides off, crashing into a pair of tires. He is a bit beat up but he's O.K.

"YAY!" shout all the Rangers at once, except a very disgusted and angry looking Dale!

 

"You know, I have no idea why those guys kidnapped me!" Flash says to the Rangers. The Rangers are all gathered around Flash looking up at him, except Dale who is sitting in the parked Ranger Plane a short distance away. He is looking away from the others and has his arms folded across his chest. An angry look covers his face.

"But," Flash continues as he puts a paw to his puffed out chest, "TV stars have to be on the lookout all the time!"

"Funny," says Monty, rubbing his chin in thought and looking towards the building. "That cat back there looked a mite familiar!" (As you can see, this is an early episode.)

"Well," says Flash, "this kind of life is too tough for me! I've got to get back to my TV show! So long! Uh........"

Flash looks over at the Ranger Wing. He's aware his little fan is refusing to look at him and is upset, but doesn't understand why.

"Bye, little feller! See you in the audience, huh?!" Flash says trying to be nice. Dale doesn't budge.

Flash leans over to Chip. "What's the matter with HIM?" he asks.

"I guess he's just a little disappointed." Chip answers, looking sadly at Dale.

"You see," Gadget explains, "you were his HERO!"

"He REALLY looked up to you, mate!" Monty adds.

"And I let him down....." Flash sees the dilemma and walks over to the Ranger Plane. He bends over and looks right at Dale with his head at Dale's level so Dale could look him right in the face. Dale, however, turns his eyes in the other direction.

"Sorry, little feller," Flash begins (he REALLY should learn his fans' names), "but I-I-I'm no hero." Flash finds this a little hard to say, I notice. "I'm just a TV actor."

Flash walks away, seeing that Dale doesn't want to respond, but Dale goes from a disgusted look to a very sad look when Flash leaves.

"Well,....thanks again! Bye!" Flash says to the other Rangers as he slowly walks off. The Rangers all say their good-byes a little quietly. Dale watches Flash leave from the Ranger Plane. A tear comes to his eye and he wipes it away. He folds his arms across the top of the back seat and rests his chin on them as he continues to watch Flashwalk off.

 

The screen fades to a shot of inside RR HQ some time later. Zipper flies through the door holding a pink flower. He flies over to Dale who is sitting at the dinner table, still upset over what he witnessed a little while ago. Zipper offers the flower to him, smiling. Dale only flicks a pebble off the table. He doesn't even look up, much to Zip's disappointment.

Gadget comes down the slide, holding a box that she shows to Dale! "Hey, Dale! Wanna come to my workshop and see my latest invention?!" She holds the box up. It pops open revealing a cylinder shaped whatchamacallit with a doo-hickey spinning around. No, I can't describe it any better!

"Look what I baked for ya, pally!" says Monty as he comes out of the kitchen, holding a pan full of a yellow saucy food. "Cheddar cheeeeheeheeheese (he takes a whiff of it himself) casserole (what a surprise)!!!"

Dale doesn't move. Zipper, still next to Dale, looks over at the others and shakes his head sadly.

"It's no use," says Chip who has just entered the room, but apparently heard what was going on. "Nothing cheers him up!"

"Right. Well," says Monty, looking at his casserole with a smile, "no sense letting good food go to waste, eh?!!" Without waiting to hear an opinion, he crams the whole casserole (pan included) into his mouth.

Well, it's nice to see he has a lot of IRON in his diet! BA-DUM-CHING!

Thank you!

"Hey, Dale! How about the TV?!" Chip offers. Dale responds by burying his face in his arms on the table. This annoys Chip, but he decides to watch TV himself and clicks the set on. A newsman's voice fills the room.

"Reports are pouring in from all over the city, and there can be no doubt about it! FLASH THE WONDER DOG HAS RUN AMUCK! Even now, police and animal regulation officers are combing the streets, but when this crazed canine will be stopped is anybody's guess!"

As the announcer speaks, the screen shows the carnage that the fake Flashes committed earlier. Every one of those people mistook Fat Cat's gang members for Flash! Incredible.

The Rangers stare at the screen in disbelief. Even Dale. "He couldn't have done all those things!" says Chip, turning to the others. "He was locked up!"

"Maybe that's why someone wanted him out of the way!!" exclaims Gadget, figuring out Fat Cat's motive!

Dale springs out of his chair; his depression replaced with determination. "Flash may not be a hero, but he's no bad guy!" he declares.

"We better get to him before someone else does!" Monty suggests.

Dale races to the doorway to the hangar, skids to a stop and looks back at the others. "To the TV station!" he orders. "Rescue Rangers away!" Dale runs into the hangar, the other are right behind him. How about that?! Not a word of protest from Chip!

Meanwhile, another TV (guess where) was tuned into the news, which was showing the director of the "Flash" show being interviewed by several newspeople.

"I just want to go on record as saying I never trusted that mutt (Grrrrrrrrrrrr), and to take his place," says the director, holding out his arm, which Conrad immediately flies over to and perches on, "I've hired Conrad the Wonder Bird!" I thought he was already an employee and that his name was Conrad Cockatoo!

"THE BIRD?!!" roars Fat Cat at his desk. He had been watching to see how his plan was going and had suddenly seen a flaw in it that he hadn't counted on! "How disgustingly REPULSIVE!" he continues, plopping his chin on his hands with both elbows on his desk. "When are they going to give the starring role to A CAT?!" he moans. Was THAT one of his motives for this whole scheme?!

Just then, the elevator doors open and there is Mepps, hopping from one foot to another, impatient for the door to open. He runs to Fat Cat's desk. "Boss, I got bad news!" he wails.

"Don't tell me you let that flea-bitten dog escape!!" Fat Cat snarls, bolting straight up from his chair, slamming both paws down on his desk.

"OK! OK! I WON'T tell you!" Mepps says, waving both hands in front of his face, wanting his Boss to remain calm.

Fat Cat walks to the window and looks outside for a moment, both of his hands behind his back. "Let me guess," he says, raising a finger in the air, "does this have anything to do with.."

Fat Cat whirls around to face Mepps. His eyes are flaming and his paws are both clenched into fists.

"THE RESCUE RANGERS?!!!!!!"

"Yeah! Good guess, boss!" says Mepps, missing the point of Fat Cat's question. "How did ya know?"

"Because those rodents are always ruining my bad intentions!!" yells Fat Cat. He towers over Mepps as he says this and leans down, forcing Mepps to cower back until he's lying on the floor.

Fat Cat recovers himself, straightens up and calmly says

"Nevertheless, I shan't let this news startle in my day." I'm sorry. I ran the tape over and over and OVER again. THAT'S what he said! It doesn't make sense to me either! Anyway Fat Cat pushes a button on his desk and a trap door opens right underneath Mepps. He looks down, sees this, does a take THEN falls through the hole, shrieking all the way down. A classic routine!

"Hmmm," says Fat Cat, once again twirling his whiskers. This new problem called for immediate attention and Fat Cat immediately came up with a plan.

"I believe I." he begins, then ANOTHER IDEA came into his head and he grinned evilly. "I mean, FLASH THE WONDER DOG, will viciously attack his former co-star ON NATIONWIDE TV!!!"

Fat Cat begins laughing and laughing and LAUGHING as the "camera" zooms in on the TV where Conrad is saluting the TV audience, unaware of the danger that awaits him.

COMMERCIAL BREAK

 

When we come back from the commercial, we see a crowd of people gathered around the TV studio, waving signs and shouting. We see the construction workers and the apple box packers and the mother with her baby carriage! You'd think these people would have gone home and changed before starting a demonstration! They are shouting protests over what "Flash did"!

And, oh dear, here comes Flash around the corner now! "Ah! Home at last!" he says as he spots the studio.

"There he is! THERE"S FLASH!" shouts the foreman whose car was destroyed and they all start running toward him!

"Ah! My fans have missed me!" Flash says overjoyed. But as they get closer, Flash's smile slowly fades to a worried frown. "Something tells me it's not my autograph they're after!" he exclaims, by this time more than a little afraid.

Just in time, Flash takes off around the corner. The crowd is right behind him. They tear down a street, past a row of garbage cans. After they pass, Flash pops his head out from one of the cans, the lid resting on his head. Rather clever move, I must say!

"What's going on?!" he gasps. "My fans have deserted me!!"

"There he is!! Get him!" yells the foreman. A look of panic comes on Flash's face. He bolts from the trashcan, heading back towards the studio. The crowd is right behind him.

The Ranger Plane appears overhead. Gadget is driving; Monty's in the co-pilot seat and Chip and Dale are in the back seat. "There's Flash!" Dale exclaims, his earlier disappointment seems to have been forgotten. In fact, he leans out of the Plane until he's hanging by his feet. Chip reaches over and hauls him back in, thankfully.

"He went into the TV studio!" Chip observes. "Put 'er down on the roof, Gadget!" he orders. Gadget heads toward the roof, as ordered..

The screen cuts to a shot of inside the studio, where they are just beginning the start of their new show. "Conrad THE WONDER BIRD!" says the just-off-camera announcer. Cameraman zooms in on Conrad, perched on a perch in the middle of the stage. There is a huge red bird footprint in a yellow circle behind him (his logo apparently).

"BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!" he yells out to the TV audience. I can hear Richard Wagner spinning in his grave.

The Rangers peek out from the foot of a camera (They got down fast!), then hide behind it as Flash rushes past them onto the stage.

Flash runs onto the stage, sliding to a stop at Conrad's perch.

"Conrad! You've got to help me!" he says standing on his hind legs and pawing at Conrad's perch.

Conrad is terrified! "AWK! AWK! HELP! HELP! MAD DOG! MAD DOG! AWK! KEEP HIM AWAY!" Funny, he didn't talk like that earlier.

"IT'S FLASH!!" yells the director, inside the control booth. "He wants revenge on Conrad for stealing his show!" (The conclusions some people are coming to around here!) The director grabs the microphone and calls to the people in the studio"Put on a stand-by sign and GET THAT DOG!"

The director runs out of the control booth and he along with the stagehands, cameramen and others rush the stage. Flash, once again, gets a panicky expression on his face and rushes from the stage and down the hall with this new mob close behind.

The screen cuts to inside another studio where a cooking show has begun filming. A large chef is standing behind a counter in a studio kitchen. "Today on 'Looking at Cooking'," says the chef with a French accent, "we will be preparing the soufflé! And remem-bair," he says, putting eggs into a mixing bowl, "the soufflé must be done just right or it will be a." He is interrupted as Flash runs through the studio. He jumps onto, then skids across the table, sending the bowl of eggs up into the air and then down on the chef's head. The TV people are still on his heels. "..disas-tair." the egg-covered chef finishes as the pans hanging on the wall clatter to the ground.

The screen cuts to a second studio where another show is starting. "So, Jeff, what say today we learn what makes pulleys and levers move?" an old bald man dressed as scientist says to a ten year old boy on a stage that looks like a science lab with all kinds of equipment on it.

"Aw gee, Mr. Wizzer!" says Jeff (Oh, give us a break!). "I was hoping you'd show us how to make plastic explosives out of household detergents!." The two are interrupted by Flash and his pursuers who stampede through the studio. When the dust clears, we see Mr. Wizzer and Jeff hanging on the pulleys and the set in shambles.

Flash leads his pursuers down the hall into the station's tape library (I used to work in a place like that!) where he half collides with a table, knocking over a stack of tape reels. Flash dashes through the room but the TV people are left.(snort)..tied up for a while! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Flash runs out a doorway, closing and bolting the door behind him! He then leans against the door and does a combination of panting and letting off squeaks of fright. It doesn't last long as there is soon loud voices heard behind the door and we see the bolt being toyed with (from the other side, apparently).

"Help me put this on," Fat Cat says to his four helpers (Phooey! Mepps is still alive!). They are somewhere in the halls of the TV station! The four misfit creatures help Fat Cat into his Flash costume, which he was already halfway into, and Fat Cat fastens the Flash cap on nice and snug! "I've got a plan that will seal Flash's fate FOREVER!" he exclaims, rubbing his paws together.

Meanwhile, Flash, who was running away, again, slides to a stop in the backstage area, next to the ladder leading to the walkway above the stage! "Gotta hide! GOTTA HIDE!" he whines. He looks up the ladder to the walkway. The sight alone makes him dizzy, but he realizes something. "There's nowhere to go but .GULP..UP!!" With that, he races up the ladder! The crew people run by, not even bothering to look up.

The "camera" moves down to floor level as Chip and Dale come running up. They, too, stop at the ladder. They look around for a while, then Chip spots Flash crawling along the walkway. "There he is!" says Chip, pointing up. "How'd he get WAY UP THERE?!" exclaims Dale. The two chipmunks start up the ladder after Flash. They have to pull themselves up each rung.

Meanwhile, on the "Conrad Show" set, the announcer and Conrad are looking around, wondering where everyone is. "Don't worry, Conrad!" says the announcer, giving Conrad a friendly little chuck (light punch) on the wing. "You're safe with me!" Conrad gives the announcer an "I'm-not-so-sure look", rubbing his wing. Neither one of them is aware of "Fat Cat Flash" sneaking up from behind until he nabs Conrad, who lets out a squawk as he's pulled off his perch!!

The TV people who were after Flash all charge into the "Conrad" set, apparently thinking Flash ducked back in there! "Back off everybody!" the announcer pleads. "He's got Conrad!" The TV people freeze in their tracks, not wanting to give the costumed feline, who has Conrad tucked under his arm with one paw clamped on his beak, a reason to do something desperate. Can you believe they ALL THINK IT'S FLASH?!! I'm VERY insulted! GRRRRRRRR!

Meanwhile, Chip and Dale have reached the walkway and are looking down at this predicament. "That's not Flash!" Dale exclaims. "That's a FAKE FLASH!!" THANK YOU, Dale!

Monterey Jack, Gadget and Zipper are in the control room, for some reason, watching all this as well. "Can't those bloomin' idiots SEE that's not Flash?!" Monty exclaims disgustedly. AMEN, Brother Monty!

"Wait a sec!" says Gadget, pointing to the TV monitors which all have "Please Stand By" on them. "No one will see anything unless we get those cameras turned on! Monterey Jack," she orders," get one of those cameras turned around!" Monty runs off to do just that. "Zipper," says Gadget to the little green fly, "you stay here and help me in the control room!'

"Oh, I hate heights!" moans Flash, crawling across the walkway. I REALLY HATE HEIGHTS!" His whines are interrupted by voices down below.

"Somebody do something!" the director howls. "We can't! He might hurt Conrad!" the announcer's voice speaks up. Flash looks down at source of the commotion and sees "Fat Cat Flash" holding the TV crew at bay.

"HEY!" Flash exclaims. "That's ME!" (Oh, no, Flash! Not YOU, too!) An angry face slowly forms over Flash's face as he realizes something. "Or.someone trying to be me!" (Good boy!)

Monty has made his way to one of the cameras and is slowly but surely pushing it around in the direction of the stage. "These things are harder to move than a sleeping rhino!" he grunts.

Back in the control room, Gadget has all the switches and dials set to the right positions. "Zipper," she calls, "when I give you the signal, hit that red button!" "OK!" Zipper squeaks, saluting. He clearly says "OK". I'm positive!

Up on the walkway, Chip and Dale run up Flash's tail and onto his back. "Quick, quick, quick!" shrieks Dale jumping down in front of Flash. "Flash, you've gotta do something! You've gotta save Conrad!" Flash looks at Dale for a moment, then he nods his head and..

"ARR-ARR-ARR-ARR-ARRRRRRRRRR!"

Fat Cat freezes at the sound coming from above him. "Oh NO!" he moans looking up.

Flash has taken a rope from one of the pulleys hanging from the ceiling and, with the two chipmunks on his back swings down towards the stage.

"Hooray!" crows Dale. You might say that seeing Conrad in danger put a CHIP on Flash's shoulder! (GROAN!)

"NOW!" Gadget yells to Zipper. Zipper salutes, again, then nose dives down on the big red button, pushing it down. He does this, unintentionally I'm sure, with his face, nearly knocking himself out. Still, the screen goes from "Please Stand By" to live action of Flash slamming into Fat Cat. "Good! The whole world's seeing this!" Gadget smiles at Zipper who is still staggering around on the control desk.

Flash slides across the stage, using Fat Cat as a sled of sorts, until Fat Cat's head slams into the wall. Flash pulls Fat Cat's "Flash hat" off to a gasp from the TV crew.

"Hey!" says the director. "That's not Flash! That's a FAKE FLASH!" Did that "Flash Hat" make all that difference?! "And that's the real one!" the director says indicating Flash who is holding the "Flash cap" in his mouth with a smile on his face and a smiling Conrad on his back.

The moment is short-lived, however, as Fat Cat snatches Conrad and runs to the other side of the stage. Flash takes off after him (GO GET 'IM, FLASH!) but slides to a halt as the Four Stooges jump in front of him, making a wall between him and Fat Cat.

"Get back or the bird gets plucked!" threatens Fat Cat, pulling on one of Conrad's tail feathers for emphasis.

Chip and Dale have made their way to the top of the backstage firehose. "I'll turn it on, you aim it!" Chip tells Dale. Chip turns the faucet easily, but Dale's job turns out to be not so easy as the hose jumps to life, spraying water at will.

"YEEEEEE HAW! HUH HUH HUH! HUH HUH HAY!" Dale howls and laughs as the hose flies through the air, first soaking a cameraman, then, as Dale gets control somehow, he points it straight at Fat Cat!

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" Fat Cat howls as a huge stream of water hits him! His four henchcreatures watch him fly backwards just as the same stream of water sends them flying. All five of the villains are sent flying out the stage door and hurtling down the back alley. Looks like another one of Fat Cat's plans has been all washed up (stupid cartoon puns--you know I love 'em!).

"C'mon, Dale!" Chip shouts to Dale as he turns off the hose. Dale is sent crashing to the floor. Chip grabs him by the hand and hurriedly drags him off the stage, while on stage, Conrad gives Flash a salute.

"Aw, Flash," says the director, kneeling beside him and rubbing his head, "I knew all the time you didn't pull all those stunts! Can you ever forgive us?" Flash thinks about it for a moment, but when all the TV people start cheering and applauding, he gives them all a big smile.

The Rangers, in the meantime, had made their way to the door leading outside. "Well, looks like Flash is big hero again!" says Chip looking back towards the stage.

"YEAH!" Dale agrees with a BIG smile on his face.

"And this time, he deserves it! C'mon, guys!" says Chip. "Let's go home!"

The Rangers all head out the door and across the dirt and puddle-filled path towards home (UH..GUYS?!! The Ranger Plane's on the ROOF!!). The door closes behind them, but a few seconds later, it is knocked open by Flash.

"Hey, guys! Wait up!" he calls. The Rangers stop and look back at Flash who bounds out the door, down the stairs and.SPLASH.into a puddle. All four of the Rangers get a splashing.

"I just wanted to say thanks!" Flash says. "Thanks for helping me look like a hero!"

"It was YOU who did that, Flash!" Gadget smiles up at him.

Flash is too full of emotion to say anything, so he just bends down and covers them all with big sloppy dog kisses (SLURP SLURP SLURP). The Rangers all laugh good-naturedly. "Ooooo! That tickles!" Gadget giggles. Flash gets a hold of himself after a while.

Chip wipes his face off, then pulls a HUGE RR badge out from coat (did he have that stuffed away in his jacket all this time?!) and walks towards Flash holding it up. "Here ya go, Flash!" he says. Flash lies on the ground so Chip can reach him. "Honorary membership in the Rescue Rangers!" proclaims Chip, pinning on the badge. "For once I agree with Dale.you deserve it!" Uh, Chip? YOU said he deserves it! Poor little guy. He's going senile!

Flash looks at Chip and Dale with a big smile, then wraps them up in a big hug with his front paws. "Aw, I wish I could do something for you guys!" he says.

Monty and Gadget start snickering. "I think you did, Flash!" Gadget says. "You made them honorary Wonder Dogs!" Chip and Dale look and see that they have muddy Flash pawprints on their posteriors and arm in arm they let out a Flash "Woof-woof-woof-woof-woof-woooof!' then burst out laughing as we come to

THE END

 

Rescue Rangers and all characters and episodes copyright the Walt Disney Corporation and used without permission.

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